Please note. This guide shares general information only. It is not legal, financial, tax or professional advice. Laws vary by state and city. For advice about your situation, talk with a licensed professional.
Hi friend. If someone is hurting you, scaring you or controlling you, please hear this: it is not your fault, and you deserve to be safe. There are people in New York ready to help, any time, day or night.
Here is the easy first step: call the New York State Domestic and Sexual Violence Hotline at 800.942.6906, or text 844.997.2121. It's at no cost and private, open 24/7, and they can help you find a local program near you.
A few things to know
- You choose. You are the expert on your own safety. Use what feels right for you and skip anything that doesn't.
- Each place decides who it can serve. We share what each place says it offers and how to reach it. We can't promise a bed, money or a spot in any program.
- Help is for everyone: women, men, LGBTQ+ people, teens in dating abuse, older adults, people with disabilities and immigrants. You don't need papers to call.
- Be careful with your phone and computer. If someone checks your devices, use a phone or computer they can't see, like at a library or a friend's house.
- In danger right now? Call 911. Thinking about suicide or in crisis? Call or text 988.
You can call even if you're not sure it's "bad enough." Advocates listen, help you think through your choices, and never judge.
- New York State Domestic and Sexual Violence Hotline: call 800.942.6906, text 844.997.2121, or chat at opdv.ny.gov. It's confidential, open 24/7, and helps in most languages.
- In New York City: the NYC 24 Hour Hope Hotline, 800.621.4673. TTY 800.810.7444.
- National Domestic Violence Hotline: call 800.799.7233, text START to 88788, or chat at thehotline.org.
- Your county's 24 hour line is in the county list later in this guide.
Source (As of October 22, 2026): https://opdv.ny.gov/ and https://www.thehotline.org/plan-for-safety/
What to say when you call
"Hi. I'm not safe at home, and I don't know what to do."
"I'm calling from [your city or county]. Can you help me find a safe place?"
"I have [number] kids with me." Say if you have pets too. Some centers can help with pets.
"Is it safe for you to call me back at this number?" Tell them if it isn't.
A quick exit
Many hotline websites have a quick exit button that takes you off the page fast. On a shared device, you can also use a private or incognito window. Little things like that can help you stay safe.
How do I know if it's abuse?
Abuse isn't only hitting. The National Domestic Violence Hotline says abuse is about power and control, and that even one or two of these behaviors is a red flag:
- Telling you that you never do anything right.
- Extreme jealousy, or keeping you away from friends and family.
- Insulting or shaming you, especially in front of others.
- Stopping you from making your own choices, like working or going to school.
- Taking your money or refusing money for things you need.
- Pressuring you into sex, drugs or alcohol.
- Threatening looks or actions, or threats to hurt or take your kids or pets.
- Scaring you with weapons, or destroying your things or your home.
If any of this sounds familiar, you can call an advocate just to talk. No one deserves abuse of any kind, for any reason.
Source (As of October 22, 2026): https://www.thehotline.org/identify-abuse/domestic-abuse-warning-signs/
How do I make a safety plan?
A safety plan is a simple, personal plan for staying safer, whether you stay, are thinking about leaving, or have already left. The National Domestic Violence Hotline offers no cost help making one with a live advocate.
A simple safety plan, step by step
- Pick a safe place to go, like a friend's home, a public place, or a domestic violence center.
- Choose a code word for friends or family that means "call for help."
- Keep important numbers memorized or written somewhere safe.
- Pack a small bag with copies of key papers, medicine, a phone charger and some cash, and keep it where it can't be found, or with someone you trust.
- Plan how you would get out of your home quickly, and practice it with your kids if it's safe.
- Call an advocate to talk your plan through.
Papers and things to take, if you can
You don't have to have it all figured out to reach out. One call is enough for today, friend.
From the Bunklow team
Where can I stay if I need to leave?
New York has domestic violence programs in every county. The state Office for the Prevention of Domestic Violence (OPDV) keeps a county by county list of programs.
Many offer emergency shelter, counseling, help with court, and support for kids.
- In New York City, call the Hope Hotline at 800.621.4673 for help getting into domestic violence shelter, any hour.
- Shelter locations are kept private for safety. Call the program's 24 hour line to get in.
- If a program is full, ask them to help you find another safe place.
- The county list later in this guide has hotlines near you.
Source (As of October 22, 2026): https://opdv.ny.gov/ and https://nyc.gov/fjc
How do I get an order of protection in New York?
In New York, a court order to keep someone away is called an order of protection. Here is what the New York courts and OPDV say about Family Court.
- Filing a family offense petition in Family Court is at no cost, and you can file without a lawyer. Court staff can help with the forms.
- If you can't afford a lawyer, you can ask the court to appoint one at no cost.
- If you come while Family Court is open, you can file that same day, and a judge can give you a temporary order of protection that day or the next court day. It takes effect once the other person is served.
- Family Court closed? A Criminal Court can issue a temporary order, and you can also call the police.
Your local domestic violence program can help with the forms. This is general information, not legal advice. For help with your situation, talk with an advocate or a lawyer. See Guide 13 for no cost legal help.
Source (As of October 22, 2026): https://www.nycourts.gov/courthelp/Safety/familyFiling.shtml and https://opdv.ny.gov/orders-protection
Say you want to ask for an order of protection
Say your ex has been threatening you, and you want a court order to keep them away. You could go to Family Court in your county while it's open and file a family offense petition. The courts say it's at no cost, you don't need a lawyer, and you can ask for a temporary order the same day or the next court day.
You could also call your local domestic violence program first. Advocates can explain the steps and may go with you.
This is an example to show how it can work. It is not about a real person, and every situation is different. Source (As of October 22, 2026): https://www.nycourts.gov/courthelp/Safety/familyFiling.shtml
Can I keep my new address private?
New York has an Address Confidentiality Program, run by the Department of State. It gives you a no cost substitute mailing address to use instead of your home, school or work address, and forwards your mail.
- It serves victims of domestic violence and their household members who have moved somewhere the abuser doesn't know.
- Call 518.474.7306 or 855.350.4595.
- Ask your local domestic violence program about it. Advocates can help you apply.
Source (As of October 22, 2026): https://dos.ny.gov/address-confidentiality-program
What housing help is there if I'm a survivor?
If you live in HUD assisted housing, like public housing or a Housing Choice Voucher, HUD has extra protections for survivors through VAWA. HUD says:
- Survivors shouldn't lose their home or help because of abuse committed against them.
- Survivors shouldn't be turned away because of things the abuse caused, like an eviction record or bad credit.
- Can ask the housing provider for an emergency transfer for safety reasons.
- Survivors can ask that information about the abuse be kept confidential. Questions about the details? Check the official page below, and decide what's right for you.
Source (As of October 22, 2026): https://www.hud.gov/vawa
Rent and need to leave for safety? You may be able to end your lease early in New York.
- Questions about the details? Check the official page below, and decide what's right for you.
- Keep papers like an order of protection, a police report, or a form signed by an advocate.
An advocate or legal aid can help you with the notice. Source (As of October 22, 2026): https://www.lawhelpny.org/
Help with costs. The New York State Office of Victim Services may help pay some costs after a crime, like medical or counseling bills or lost wages, and funds local programs that help with shelter and moving. Call 800.247.8035. Source (As of October 22, 2026): https://ovs.ny.gov/
Kids and pets, too
When you call a center, tell them about your kids and pets. Ask what support they have for children, and if they can help with a safe place for your pet. You're doing so great by asking.
Does it cost money to get an order of protection in New York?
No. The New York courts say filing a family offense petition in Family Court is at no cost, and you can file without a lawyer.
Will the hotline tell anyone I called?
The hotline is private. Ask the advocate any questions you have about privacy when you call.
Can I bring my kids to a shelter?
Many centers serve parents with children. Ask the center when you call.
What if I'm not ready to leave?
That's OK. Advocates can help you make a safety plan while you stay, and you can call back any time.
I live in public housing. Can I be evicted because of the abuse?
HUD says VAWA protects survivors in HUD assisted housing from eviction because of the abuse committed against them.
Federal help (works in every state)
Here are some places to start.
National Domestic Violence Hotline
What it offers No cost, confidential support 24/7. Advocates help with safety planning, crisis support and local referrals. The Hotline itself does not hand out cash or hotel vouchers, but it can connect you with local groups that may.
How to reach Call 800.799.7233. Text START to 88788. Chat at thehotline.org. Local shelters and legal help: https://www.thehotline.org/get-help/directory-of-local-providers
Source https://www.thehotline.org/
Last checked October 16, 2026
Other national lines listed by the Hotline
What it offers StrongHearts Native Helpline for Native Americans and Alaska Natives. love is respect for young people. The Deaf Hotline by video phone.
How to reach StrongHearts 844.762.8483. love is respect 866.331.9474. Deaf Hotline video phone 855.812.1001.
Source https://www.thehotline.org/
Last checked October 16, 2026
Other local groups may also help.
New York State
Here are some places to start.
NYS Domestic and Sexual Violence Hotline
What it offers Confidential support 24/7 in most languages, run through the state Office for the Prevention of Domestic Violence (OPDV). Calls, texts and chats are private.
How to reach Call 800.942.6906. Text 844.997.2121. Chat at https://opdv.ny.gov/chat
Source https://opdv.ny.gov/
Last checked October 16, 2026
OPDV: Find a Provider by county
What it offers A county by county list of domestic and sexual violence programs across New York. This is the quickest way to find help on Long Island, in Westchester, Buffalo, Rochester and every other county.
How to reach https://opdv.ny.gov/domestic-and-sexual-violence-service-providers-county
Source https://opdv.ny.gov/
Last checked October 16, 2026
OPDV: Orders of Protection
What it offers Plain information on orders of protection in New York and how to get one.
How to reach https://opdv.ny.gov/orders-protection
Source https://opdv.ny.gov/
Last checked October 16, 2026
NYS Office of Victim Services (OVS)
What it offers OVS may help pay some out of pocket costs after a crime, like medical and counseling bills or lost wages. It also funds more than 200 local Victim Assistance Programs that offer counseling, advocacy, emergency shelter and help relocating.
How to reach Call 800.247.8035. Find a local program at ovs.ny.gov/connect
Source https://ovs.ny.gov/
Last checked October 16, 2026
Address Confidentiality Program (NYS Department of State)
What it offers A no cost substitute mailing address you can use instead of your home, school or work address. The program forwards your mail and accepts legal notices for you. It serves victims of domestic violence and their household members who have moved somewhere the abuser does not know.
How to reach Call 518.474.7306 or 855.350.4595. Mail: Address Confidentiality Program, P.O. Box 1110, Albany, NY 12201
Source https://dos.ny.gov/address-confidentiality-program
Last checked October 16, 2026
OVS Resource Connect
What it offers Search for state funded victim programs near your address.
How to reach ovs.ny.concerncenter.com
Source https://ovs.ny.gov/
Last checked October 16, 2026
Hotline local provider directory
What it offers Search shelters, legal help, counseling and financial aid near you.
How to reach https://www.thehotline.org/get-help/directory-of-local-providers
Source https://www.thehotline.org/
Last checked October 16, 2026
Other local groups may also help.
New York City (all five boroughs)
Here are some places to start.
NYC 24 Hour Hope Hotline
What it offers Immediate safety planning, help getting into domestic violence shelter, and other support, any hour of any day.
How to reach Call 800.621.4673 (1.800.621.HOPE). TTY 800.810.7444.
Source https://nyc.gov/fjc
Last checked October 16, 2026
NYC Family Justice Centers
What it offers No cost, confidential help in person or by phone for survivors of domestic and gender based violence, including stalking and trafficking. Centers can connect you with case management, counseling, legal help and money skills. There is a center in each borough.
How to reach Call 311 and ask for the nearest Family Justice Center. Open Monday to Friday, 9 am to 5 pm.
Source https://nyc.gov/fjc
Last checked October 16, 2026
Other local groups may also help.
Nassau County
Here are some places to start.
The Safe Center LI
What it offers Help for survivors of domestic violence and sexual assault in Nassau County. Its hotline is answered by the NYS Domestic and Sexual Violence Hotline.
How to reach Nassau County Domestic Violence and Sexual Assault Hotline: 516.542.0404. https://www.tscli.org/
Source https://www.tscli.org/
Last checked October 16, 2026
Other local groups may also help.
Suffolk County
Here are some places to start.
L.I. Against Domestic Violence
What it offers A 24 hour hotline, shelter, counseling and legal services for survivors on Long Island.
How to reach 24 Hour Hotline: 631.666.8833. https://www.liadv.org/
Source https://www.liadv.org/
Last checked October 16, 2026
Other local groups may also help.
Westchester County
Here are some places to start.
Hope's Door
What it offers A 24/7 hotline and help for survivors of abuse to reach safety, independence and healing. Se habla español. Chat and text are on its website.
How to reach 24/7 Hotline: 888.438.8700. https://www.hopesdoorny.org/
Source https://www.hopesdoorny.org/
Last checked October 16, 2026
Other local groups may also help.
Erie County (Buffalo)
Here are some places to start.
Family Justice Center of Erie County
What it offers No cost help for survivors of domestic violence in one place, with advocates and partners.
How to reach 438 Main Street, Suite 201, Buffalo. 716.558.7233. https://fjcsafe.org/
Source https://fjcsafe.org/
Last checked October 16, 2026
Other local groups may also help.
Monroe County (Rochester)
Here are some places to start.
Willow Domestic Violence Center
What it offers Help for all genders and all ages, for all types of abuse. All services are at no cost and confidential. En español.
How to reach 24 hour hotline: call 585.222.7233 (585.222.SAFE) or text 585.348.7233. https://willowcenterny.org/
Source https://willowcenterny.org/
Last checked October 16, 2026
Other local groups may also help.
Onondaga County (Syracuse)
Here are some places to start.
Vera House
What it offers A 24 hour support line and live web chat for people affected by domestic and sexual violence.
How to reach 24 Hour Support Line: 315.468.3260. TTY during business hours: 315.484.7263. https://www.verahouse.org/
Source https://www.verahouse.org/
Last checked October 16, 2026
Other local groups may also help.
Albany County
Here are some places to start.
Equinox Domestic Violence Services
What it offers Help for victims of domestic violence in the Capital Region, with a hotline and online chat.
How to reach Domestic Abuse Hotline: 518.432.7865. https://www.equinoxinc.org/
Source https://www.equinoxinc.org/
Last checked October 16, 2026
Other local groups may also help.
My safety plan
Fill this in only if it's safe to keep. You can also just memorize it. You've got this!
My safety plan
Calls I made
Key numbers to keep
Please let me know if you have any questions
If something in this guide is out of date, tell us and we'll fix it. You deserve to be safe and happy. Take care, friend.
About this guide
Made by the Bunklow team. No sign up, no paywall, no cost. Please share it with anyone who could use it. Bunklow does not run these programs and cannot speak for them. We list what each place says it offers and how to reach it, and you decide what to use. This is not a full list of every place that can help. Every source was checked on October 16, 2026. If something has changed, please tell us so we can fix it. We are always happy to hear from you!
Please note. This guide shares general information only. It is not legal, financial, tax or professional advice. Laws vary by state and city. For advice about your situation, talk with a licensed professional.
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