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Guide · Renting and leases

Talking with Your Landlord

A friendly, practical guide to clear, kind communication between residents and owners, from writing things down and expected response times to tone, timing and hard conversations.

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Where to start

The short version

Good communication builds good tenancies, and most hard ones start with a misunderstanding.

Put important requests in writing, and say what, where, when and what you need, with a photo.

Stay kind, even when frustrated. Wait an hour before sending an angry message.

Owners acknowledge messages quickly and keep residents updated. Everyone closes the loop with a thank-you.

Notice rules differ from place to place, so we’d gently encourage a quick look at the rules where your home is. If you ever have questions, we would love to help.

Four simple rules

  1. 1
    Put it in writing

    Important requests, notices and agreements belong in writing, with dates.

  2. 2
    Be clear and specific

    Say what, where, when and what you are hoping for.

  3. 3
    Stay kind

    A calm, respectful tone gets faster, better results, even when frustrated.

  4. 4
    Close the loop

    Confirm when things are done, and say thank you.

Try it

Talking with your landlord checklist

From the guide’s own checklist. Tick each one as you go. Your ticks stay on this device. These are examples; your home may need others.

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How to ask for a repair in writing

From the guide’s chapter on repairs. Adapt the sample in your own voice.

  1. Take photos before you write. Pictures with the date visible save many words.
  2. Say what is wrong and exactly where. Describe what you see and hear, like “water is dripping under the sink”, rather than guessing the cause.
  3. Say when you first noticed it and whether it is getting worse. If there is a safety risk, say so clearly at the start.
  4. Kindly ask for a reply by a specific, reasonable date, and share the times you are home for a visit.
  5. Use the reporting method your lease asks for, like a portal, email or letter, and keep your own copy.
  6. If you do not hear back by that date, send a short, friendly reminder that refers to your first message.

“Hello, the kitchen faucet has been dripping since last Tuesday and the cabinet beneath it is now damp. I have attached two photos. Could you let me know when someone can look at it? I am home most evenings and weekends. Thank you so much for your help.”

Keeping good records

  1. Keep your signed lease, rent receipts, every written request and reply, and notices with the date they arrived, all in one place.
  2. Right after a call or visit, jot down the date, the time, who you spoke with and what was agreed.
  3. If it matters, send a short message confirming what was said, so it becomes a written record.
  4. Use one folder on your phone or computer and one paper folder. Name files with the date and a short description, and back them up.
  5. Stick to facts in every message: what happened, when and what you are asking for.

End every conversation with a short summary, then send that same sentence by message afterward.

When the conversation gets stuck

  1. Take a breath. A stuck conversation does not mean the relationship is over.
  2. Send a brief message that refers to your earlier one, states the date, and asks again what the plan is. Messages get lost.
  3. Bring in a neutral helper, like a local tenant association, a community mediation service or a legal aid office.
  4. Before any bigger step, such as withholding rent, repairing and deducting or ending a lease early, talk with legal aid, a tenant organization or an attorney first. Local rules differ.
  5. Stay polite, stay factual and keep thanking people for what goes well.

If you feel frustrated, wait an hour before writing.

Test yourself

How much do you remember?

4 quick questions from this guide, with a one line why for each. Totally optional, no sign in, and your answers are never saved.

From The Perfect Series

Go deeper with The Perfect Move-In Checklist Workbook

Simple, step by step checklists you can write in for moving in: the move in walk, moving day, your first week, utilities, keys and more.

See The Perfect Move-In Checklist WorkbookAll books in The Perfect Series

Keep the full guide handy

The PDF has everything: everyday habits, what to do when something goes wrong, common myths, helpful resources and plenty of real-world tips. Print it, save it or share it with anyone who could use it.

Download the PDF

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This guide shares general information to help you, and is not legal advice. Bunklow does not mediate or decide disputes.

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